The Last Day of the Food Stamp Challenge

The last two days have been all about Harry Potter. I had a half day at work on Friday and I went home and have been reading off and on ever since. Last night I made more fried rice, finishing off the last of my 6 eggs and my onions too. Then I sat down with nice full glass of water of and watched "El Laberinto del Fauno" (you know it as Pan's Labyrinth, a misnomer considering I don't think they ever say Pan). Despite its high production value, it is just plain creepy. But perhaps it was true to its fairy tale roots, most actual fairy tales are pretty creepy. Try reading Grimm's originals some time and you'll know what I mean. I guess what I'm trying to say is, I liked it. It beats the shit out of "Legend" with Tom Cruise, which is the closest thing I can think to compare it to.

Today was sort of a ghost day, I made fried peanut butter sandwiches, which involves buttering your sandwich bread and frying them in a pan much like grilled cheese sandwiches. I also ate some more of fried rice. Didn't go anywhere, and didn't have much human contact beyond my parents calling and a bit of Google talk. I sort of drifted in and out of sleep. It's one of those days where you are surprised to learn that it's dark outside already.

As you know, my goal has been to spend no more than $10 dollars a day. I've plotted out my daily spending using Excel and if I taking out those shoes I bought during the wedding, my spending will average about $10.04 per day if I spend nothing until the end of the month. Not bad, but still shy of the goal. I won't be counting traveling expenses or dry cleaning in the future so I might actually be able to come with in my goal next time. The point is kind of moot though, because tonight at midnight, I'm going to buy food and beer and end this fast. Remember, if I've learned any thing it's that the poor should get at least a 33% increase in their weekly food budget. It just makes sense.

Shine on you crazy diamonds.

Breaking it down.

Starting Balance: -$51.25

In: $20 (2 days)

Out: $0

Balance: -$31.25

The Food Stamp Challenge: Day 5

Today was a tough one. The red beans and rice I brought to work wasn't that good. I got sick of eating it, threw it out and began to starve about a half hour later. Frustrated with this false state of poverty I began to hallucinate that my pen was a candy cane, my keyboard a bumpy chicken leg, my post-it pad a nice yellow sugar cookie. At the close of the day, I dragged my growling stomach past the smells of midtown and tried not to bite into Harry Potter: Book 7 like a crazed billy goat. Though I've seen stranger things than a man eating his book on the subway.

Hunger is such a ridiculous state. I wish I was like Siddhartha and could just laugh it off, but I know that every time I chase hunger away it will soon reappear. It's the like a little goblin that haunts us all, just around the corner. And when you don't have the money to spend on food, which for the duration of the week I'm pretending not to, that goblin grows into an ogre, it gains size and ferocity. It lingers even after you've eaten, just in the hall you can hear hunger breathing. You wash your dishes and hear it laughing. As if Hunger can hear you wondering how you'll next chase him away.

The other problem is variety. It's easier to buy just rice and have fix'ns for that, than to try and buy rice, pasta, and bread. You find that such a small budget forces you to repeat a few dishes. Now if I had someone else in my family or on my program it may be a bit easier. With that $21 more per week I could by hamburger meat, tomato sauce and chocolate to make Skyline Chili. I could buy more vegetables, I might even be able to purchase some of that golden animal byproduct I've come to miss so much the past few days, CHEESE. So for food's sake the Food Stamp Program may help people stick together.

But basically, as is, $21 per week means, boredom, dissatisfaction, hunger, and a distinct feeling of frustration. And through this lens, the act of giving people just enough money to not starve seems like a cruel way to keep people fed while keeping them low at the same time. Though I suppose it is better than not giving them anything as they did before the New Deal 70 years ago, isn't it? Still, it's hard to have hope while you're hungry.

The thing is, I'm in the red. I want my first month to be a success. I want break even at the end of it and have some spending money come August 1, but that means stretching out my pantry until next Wednesday. I don't know if I can make that. And even if I do, I'll spend it all right away on more food. And any kind of fun is very far away. And this is month one of six. Well, no point in despairing. We'll see how it all goes. This has been a learning experience for me, for certain. I miss beer. I bought a friend a birthday card today, other than that, no spending. I promise this will be fun again.

The Daily Breakdown

Starting Balance: -$58.75

In: $10

Out:
Card: $2.50

Balance: -$51.25