Shoestring Love

I had a conversation with my friend Jen this afternoon and I mentioned that one drawback of the Gotham Frugal is that I despair at the thought of dating. As I put it to my friend "What girl would want to hang out with a guy who can only spend ten dollars on a date?" Her pithy response: "THE girl." Right on.

Which got me thinking. I'm a creative guy. I can come up with a few ways to have fun and not spend a lot of money. So let's make some plans. I'd be going dutch with my date, of course.

Plan 1: Halal and High Art

This one is simple but day specific. For culture we go to the MOMA on free Fridays. After a good few hours of tooling around the greatest work that modern masters have to offer we hop across the street for some tasty halal, (falafel for the vegetarians) and chase that with an English lager from a nearby convenience store. Then, if the mood suits, a stroll through Central Park.

Total $15

Plan 2: Scenery and a Slice

I'm thinking about meeting at city hall, a walk across the Brooklyn Bridge, checking out a great view of downtown and then eating pizza on the other side at Grimaldi's, reputably the greatest pie in the five boroughs if not all the world. No worrying about the wait though because I'll call ahead for the pizza.

Total: $12-$19

Plan 3: Picnic in the Park

A cheap classic. One baguette, half pound o' brie, Charles Shaw, and one pear. She can bring what ever else she likes, salad would be great, some olives and peppers even better. I like how picnics like this can be a metaphor for dating. They both only work well if each party has something to bring.

Total: $15-$20

Plan 4: Dancing and Dogs

How about going to a free tango or salsa lesson together. Sometimes they let students stay on later for only a small fee. There could be lots of dancing. Afterwards there's always a papaya dog nearby. But she'd have to be some girl to consider anything even remotely romantic about a papaya dog. Heck, if I didn't blow all our money at the danceria I might even spring for that.

Total: $8-$20

So those are my plans for now. If you have some cheap date suggestions, please tell me about them. And if you're a lovely young lass looking to be treated well while not being treated at all, then send me a note. You too can have a little shoestring lovin.

And now for the Lloyd Dobbler breakdown.

Starting balance: -$49.50

In: $20 (two days)

Out: $0

Balance: -$29.50

Addendum: Turns out there is something romantic about Papaya King. The founder Gus Poulos only served fruit drinks at his store until he literally "fell" for a young German girl who introduced him to the frankfurter. And now we are blessed with the fruits (and dogs) of their union.

Going Code Orange

Though I'm not out of the woods just yet, I think that I have safely reduced my numbers, enough that I can turn off the rumbling klaxon that has been sounding for the past month.

Tonight I made some red beans and rice. This will yield at least 2 more meals after the dinner I had. Along with the fried chicken I made, the last of the Skyline Chili I cooked up and I couple bags of Ramen, I have at least 6 or 7 meals to last me through Friday. And Friday I fly out of here to Oklahoma City. My parents covered that ticket, because they're great, so I don't have to break out the card again. The point being that I'm going to go ahead and let Frugal clock run, though I'm not in NYC. That way I can return on October with money to spend.

Breakdown

Starting Balance: -$59.50

In: $10

Out: $0

Balance: -$49.50

Holla for the Dollar

The dollar store. Even as the dollar falls we find it retains some value. The land of the 99 cent grab. The sweet vendor of slave made goods, where the generic brands are nearly identical to the name brands and quality is equal to the expense. I've been scoping out the dollar store for the past week. There's one directly across the street from my work offering a plethora of goods which can be yours for just a Washington. There were some products at Jack's $0.99 store that I was actually surprised by. Eggs, milk, frozen baked goods, one could score a huge box of generic saltines for a dollar and then turn around and buy the cheeze in a can to go with it.

But it's a questionable thing to shop in a dollar store. For one, you can buy a foot of hot sausage for $1.00 but the sausage is chicken, beef, pork sausage. Now until I meet a chicowig I'm going to assume that this sausage is all the bits and pieces of hundreds of animals of different species ground and smashed into a nitrate filled concoction. So I'll stay away. But I did buy 6 eggs, which are almost slightly less horrible. Now I only have to think about the beakless animals stuffed 6 to a square 18" contributing tons of industrial farming pollution each year. Who wants an omelet? Also there's a guy making the rounds at all the talkshow hosts promoting his book "Nobodies." Which gets into all the slave labor that we have in the US. He said something to the effect of "It it seems too good a bargain, it's probably because it was produced using slave labor." So basically dollar stores stink of sweat shops.

I also stopped by the grocery store. There I found chicken legs with backs for $.67 cents a pound. I might as well go the whole life cycle right? The reason those were cheap, I discovered, is because you have to de-back them, but that didn't take long and would've been quicker if I had a better knife. Looking around the store I discovered that items at the dollar store were a bit cheaper. Tuna at the grocery store is $1.29 for example. So I'm going to keep this Jack's in mind over the next few weeks. As I inch out of Condition Critical, I'm hoping that Jack and George can remain friends and help me be more frugal. And my conscience can quiet itself for a few weeks.

Breakdown:

Starting Balance: -$61.75

In: $10

Out:
Dollar store eggs: $1
Groceries: $6.75

Balance: -$59.50

Television, A Frugal's Best Friend

On Friday I told my co-worker that I would be watching movies and writing this weekend. I guess I got it half right. I got a text from a fellow Oklahoman to join her at a bar. As we know I try to avoid these places, but a body must get out from time to time. But before this, I landed at a rooftop joint with some co-workers, it was called the Library Bar. It was a nice open air bar. Cocktail waitresses in black dresses, little benches to sit on. I had one beer and I tipped. It cost me $9. New York.

Then I moved on down to the lower east side where I found a beer garden. It was good and crowded and though I arrived on time my companions didn't. I was close to leaving when my friend texted her imminent arrival. I stayed for a couple of large beers. I was a bit tipsy when leaving. When I got home I was hungry so I ordered some lo mien from across the street. I went to bed vowing not to spend anything else this weekend.

I managed to stay true to my word. On Saturday a couple of lady friends joined me to watch the BBC Nature documentary "Planet Earth." A fairly spectacular series. They brought cheap wine from Trader Joes, which is welcome in my house. After they left I joined my neighbors for an episode of Lost. The episode we watched last night was the one tracing the origins of Charlie's heroin addiction. I love Lost. What's really nutty about it though is watching the first season all over again. You know that all this crazy stuff is about to happen. Even more fun was listening to my neighbor try to guess what was going to happen. And I remember that I was still full of all sorts of crazy theories and how far off the mark they were. I mean, I don't even know if she had seen the smoke monster yet. That's hard to believe. She also handed me $20 because I've been hooking her up with free internet access via my wireless home network. I'm going to go ahead and plug it in to my balance.

Today I went to work at the newer job. It was a good time and I think I'll fit in fine. Tonight I watched Ken Burns documentary "The War." Two and a half hours is a long time to devote to one subject. It got to me and I thought the stories were interesting. But sometimes I wonder where Burns is going. Kinda meanders. Well let's meander into a breakdown.

Starting Balance: -$80.50

IN: $50

OUT
Friday:
Beers: $28
Chicken Lo Mein: $3.25

Saturday: $0

Sunday: $0


Balance: -$61.75

Careful What You Wish For

Today was one of those bummer days. I had to set out early today to fetch my daily bread from the grocery store. I also decided to pick up yeast. I'm thinking about making my own pizza dough. I was surprised to see 3 packets of yeast cost a quarter of my daily budget. So for my bread and the little critters to make my own bread and a few other sandwich fixings I went $0.75 over budget, all before 8:30 AM.

At work I was invited to go out to drinks afterwards and refused because of my ridiculous devotion to this thing I'm doing. I guess when you're in Condition Critical people flexibility isn't an option. If only our legislators were as strong as I am. We'd have a budget the world could envy and the dollar wouldn't be getting its ass kicked by something as stupid sounding as the "Euro." That's like getting beat up by a guy named "Shelby."

But discipline isn't fun and today I found myself overcome by wish thinking. I should go out and buy a ticket to the lottery. Then if I win, I can solve all my problems and pay all my debts. Not just the card. But I had heard bad things happen to lotto winners. So I googled away and found this article. Basically when you are suddenly the possessor of millions of dollars you are faced with a choice. Keep your friends and family, or keep your money. I guess money really does change people. I'd like to believe that if anyone close to me became a millionaire I would quietly sit back and wait for them to invite me to Barbados. Or offer to buy me an apartment, or hand me a Rolex watch. I think I would. It's really just like getting a hundred thousand dollar raise. That's not enough to live like Kayne. So I think I'll just keep a stiff upper lip, refuse invitations to nights out, and work that second job. It makes for more interesting writing.

Well actually, I would love to read a recent millionaire's blog. As I finish this a Mega Millions ad came on TV. Kismet?

Breakdown:

Starting Balance: -$79.75

In: $10

Out: $10.75

Balance: -$80.50

Hey Kids, Let's Build a Nation.

Today was a no spending day. Those are good days. Another shovelful of dirt on my way out of the hole. I went to work, got off around 5:15 and went to work again. I'm training, which is probationary and you don't get paid for it until after 6 months of having been on the job. Are they going to give me interest on this money? Regardless, I like the layout at this joint a bit more. And training went by quick enough today. I don't have much to add. I made fried rice this evening so I'll have something to eat for lunch tomorrow. I'll be buying bread and possibly some odd lunch meats. But it's all part of the plan people.

Tonight I watched "Kid Nation." This is a reality program where they send 40 kids out into the desert (none of them are named Moses as far as I can tell) and let the kids run their own town and learn to get along. Well, predictably, the oldest girl ends up taking over and making the whole situation work. Occasionally, like some maniacal Greek god, a man named Jonathan appears out of nowhere and gives the children bizarre color coded challenges and bestows upper class status and wealth on the winners and menial status and low wages on the losers. And then like Discord herself leaves a golden star worth $20,000 with the leaders to bestow upon the greatest kid of all. This is more like improvisational tragedy than social experiment.

The most telling part of the program was when the 14 year old matriarch, Sophia, who had been part of the losing $0.10 cent team, saw a bicycle she wanted and danced in the street for the rest of the money, which was three times the $1.00 wage that the upper class got. Using her talent she overcame the arbitrarily enforced class system in an afternoon. Beat that Gandhi. This show isn't really what I wanted. True society building offers no incentives other than society itself. I was hoping that more idealistic truths like independence, meritocracy, and social cooperation would surface. But they're really just playing a game for money. It's every other reality series only with kids and a Western theme. Lord of the Flies is what I wanted.

To all the street dancing money makers out there, this breakdown is for you.

Breakdown:

Starting Balance: -$89.75

In: $10

Out: $0

Balance: -$79.75

Hard Cleaning, Good Hunting, Tough Decisions.

Last night after a bit of bloggering, I discovered I needed paper towels. While I was shopping for those I ran into a few more lonely, lonely cans of PBR. For only $0.50 a can they weren't going to be lonely long so I invited them to come back to my place.

Today was dentist day. Hooray. It was pretty miserable. The woman wasn't what I would call gentle and apparently I needed some work cause she scraped on my for something like an hour. Luckily I had no cavities and now my teeth are fresh and pearly, though it wasn't until about two hours later that I stopped tasting blood. Still teeth are great things to have. Nothing makes that clearer, than the dream I had last night. One of those awful dreams where your teeth all fall out. My lips were sore afterwards and I decided that I needed some chap stick.

Then I went back up to the Upper East Side, directly across the street from the place I quit, to meet with Huntington tutoring. My appointment was at 6:15, I walked out at 6:20 with a job, I start tomorrow. It was so refreshingly easy. I took a look around the center and instead of banks of computers with people holding clipboards and hovering over children, there were all these tables and student and tutors working one on one. Maybe not the best way to foster independence, but so much more warm and friendly than what I saw across the street. Huntington also pays 60% more than those folks.

But today wasn't all fun and games. I've been trying to do better with this whole $10 a day plan. And honestly, it's doable, with discipline. You can have fun too. Tonight was one of those moments however when the choice to do something and the choice to do nothing bumped heads. There was a free M. Ward concert downtown. Last night it was the Hold Steady and that was free too, but I'd already seen them gratis. I really like M. Ward and would love to go to one of his shows, but I had to eat something. And for whatever reason this Condition Critical thing is getting stuck in my head. Clearly I have some sort of OCD and it hurts me at times. If I wasn't doing this budget I would've gone down there and ate a few hot dogs. Instead I went home, changed into my play clothes and cooked some clam sauce. Which was very tasty. Still I'm kicking myself over missing M. Ward. I spend too much time kicking myself. Oh well. Let's get up a get get a get down, the Gotham Frugal is having a...

Breakdown

Starting Balance: -$94.25

In: $10

Last night:
Towels and PBR: $4

Today:
Chap stick: $1.50

Balance: -$89.25

Stop and Smell the Poetic Irony

"They" say that when one door closes another one opens. On occasion "They" are right. The key is to make sure that you try one door before you slam the first.

Today I went into that godforsaken place I quit in order to sign "termination" papers. I guess the corporate world isn't done with you until they decide they are. Needless to say I'd built up some animosity towards the place and began to expect some sort of verbal exchange. But this didn't happen. When I arrived the manager told me that I needed to wait while one of the kids took shots. Shooting a basketball is one of the fun rewards that kids get at the end of a study session. There is a hoop in the center that they can throw the ball towards. But when the kids are too short or young or weak it is the coaches themselves that serve as the hoop, by holding their arms out in a loop for the ball to go in. I was impatient and excited to get this whole process over with. I've always interpreted the whole "You wait here." line as a power play. I unfortunately didn't take the time to appreciate that the manager was getting hit in the face by a ball as she made me wait. And that had I remained working there, I would be the one getting hit in the face. I signed the papers and got the heck out of dodge, assuring myself I would avoid the Upper East Side.

When I got home I opened my email and there was a invitation to come speak with another tutoring center whom I've worked for before, only at a different location. They pay better and I have less of a moral problem with them. So I'm going to talk to them tomorrow night. Funnily enough they are right across the street from the other center.

Today I didn't spend any money, well not yet.

Saturday
I found some PBR near the eggs I was shopping for at the grocery store. They needed a home.

Sunday
I did laundry for $5.

So let's do a Breakdown.

Starting Balance: -$111.75

In: $30

Saturday:
Coffee: $1.75
PBR & Eggs: $5.75

Sunday:
Laundry: $5

Monday
$0

Balance: -$94.25

I Quit! I Score!

Well, true to my word I quit. I also left them high and dry. I realized last night that if I worked in that place I would sit around thinking that everybody sucked. Including me. So I since I have no desire to suck, I won't be participating in their clicking games.

But let's take a step back. Thursday morning I had to take a taxi cab a short distance. Not something I like to do. Cabs in New York have recently had a strike in protest of putting GPS systems and credit card machines in all cabs. This cabbie had one already, so I asked him if he went on strike anyway. You can talk to cabbies in New York. If you don't mind new and different smells. He said that the cab company he works for recalled the cab. I thought that was dumb to keep a guy from making a day's wages because his boss doesn't like New York policies. The cabbie wasn't a fan of the card machines. They take 5 percent of each sale. He was even enthusiastic enough to show me some receipts and the amounts the card company took from them. I don't know what those screens are in these cabs. I'm afraid to touch them and incur some $2 surcharge. So I don't. But I tipped the guy a few bucks on a $5 ride.

Later that night I went back to work at the academic center. We ended our shift with a meeting in which we were informed of the referral process. At the end of September the center is having a pizza party and every child is invited, IF, if they bring a friend. One that doesn't already pay to go here. We were told to approach children and ask them if they had any friends that they could bring to the pizza party. It's like fishing for children with pizza. We were also asked to follow up with the parent and get the phone number of their child's friend's parent.

Then we did some role playing. I participated by being a parent. I was approached by one of the role playing tutors and basically affected the kind of confusion than any moderately aware person would who was being asked for the phone number of the parent of their child's playmate. My character was called "the jerk" parent. Which is fine. Being a jerk seems like just another demonstration that you're a person. It's not the first time people have regarded me as such. This was really the last straw. I'm being paid next to nothing at this place. I think the tutoring process, hovering over students and telling them to click buttons is simply teaching skills and co-dependence when kids need knowledge and independent thought, and now I've gone from tutoring to a sales position without commission. I think the person who reigns in the most cash would get a prize. I hope it dawns on them that they've traded their soul for tinsel. After the meeting I had a couple of beers for perspective.

So on Friday, I wrote a brief letter of resignation, and said I would cover my weekend shifts. But I reneged on that in an admittedly unprofessional manner. Aside from general laziness and a lack of tolerance for the place, I feel that the last thing those kids need is a disgusted thirty-year old hovering over them while they do something he feels they should stop immediately. I feel bad for leaving the girl on duty by herself but I also think I did right by the innocent victims in this little charade. Ironically, I got an emailed reprimand from the manager telling me that my actions harmed the students. It would've been much worse had I showed. Like those kids want to be there on Saturday morning anyway. I did apologize to the person I left stranded. There's not much more I can do, other than trust my instincts sooner. If you ever are in a situation where you're aware that you're screaming inside while it's going on, that's a good time to let it be known and then get the fuck out of dodge. Sigh.

Last night, Gen said she would come over for dinner. I had gone to Trader Joe's for some Charles Shaw earlier. I wasn't sure if she was going to show seeing as how I mistakenly thought that she would call me sometime. I was starving after having cleaned the apartment and so I ordered dumplings and Gen didn't answer her phone. Just as I was going to get the dumplings, Gen called. She was coming around the corner with the bread and cheese. We didn't have enough ingredients for the sandwiches and so we went around the corner and bought some tomatoes and avocados and a half a roasted chicken. $6 for all of it. Then we watched 300, which is a fun movie. It's like a violence porno. Not a violent porno, but a porno where it is violence that is the graphically presented fantasy. Like the free men of Sparta, I too am free.

2 Day Breakdown

Starting Balance: -$107.75

IN: $20

OUT
Thursday:
Cab: $7
Beer: $2

Friday:
Dumplings: $3.75
Wine: $3.25
Avocados: $2.50
Chicken: $3.50
Beer: $2

Balance: -$111.75

Like a Freegan

Today I lived like a freegan and spent nothing. That's what freegans do. They are a combination of non-consumer/scavengers, who swear off a life of consumerism, hence the free. Cross it with non-animal byproduct eating term vegan and boom, freegan. But unlike vegans, freegans will eat flesh if they run across some good free flesh. Speaking of which, my landlady asked me tonight if I like fish. I said "I like fish." I had a big fish for dinner. Like a freegan. Sing it to the tune of the Maddona song.

I also worked my second job. Which fills me with disgust. It's just an academic skills factory where people pay people to do the kind of shit with their kids that they themselves should be doing. Only we do it with computers. And this constant hovering over kids encouraging them to push buttons. All of it slyly concealed franchise consumerism. Like McDonalds they sell learning centers and then distribute all their branded materials to the centers and parents. They offer cards as incentives and then the kids use the tickets to buy prizes. And everything from the incentive cards to the crappy, Chinese-made, skiball toys to the study materials that they pass out is branded with the center's name.

And the management, they fucking sell it all. They tell ten-year olds to go to school the next day and tell their friends how much fun they had at this click factory. The center gives out extra incentive cards if kids wear their branded t-shirt (which they bought with incentive cards). Turning kids into little walking billboards. And I have to be friendly and always smiling and they are giving me close to minimum wage. I have a Master's degree. Now what kind of message is that sending? Parents are paying good money to see that their kids go to college and attain a degree and perhaps an advanced degree and here in front of them is a person with an advanced degree getting paid next to minimum wage.

It just seems like some Stanford Economic Masters canidate's thesis. A money making cult built on the golden mantra of Education while its priests are the greatest example of the faith's innate fallacy.

Wow. I have to quit.


Breakdown:

Starting Balance: -$117.75

In: $10

Out: $0

Balance: -$107.75

A Trip Down Short-Term Memory Lane

With the month in review and much needed apologies taking up blog space I haven't had a chance to tell you what I've been up to lately. It feels like quite a lot. The last time you got a taste of daily life was last Friday and that was just a taste.

I spent Friday night making a big batch of stew, drinking wine and eating chocolate that I had accumulated during my dark frenzy of consumerism. It was a make up party with just me and my blog. Well Saturday I awoke with a renewed vigor. I went to work out early in the morning (10:30 AM) and then I came home and began pulling apart my cabinets. Well not the cabinets themselves really but the all the dishes, plastic shelving liners and goods were removed. See I've got a problem, a few of them, maybe dozens and they all have six legs. Roaches are common enough in New York, but they've been politely hiding up until recently. Now I spot the little assholes scurrying around and it makes me sad. I must be filthy. I must be a dirty pig incapable of keeping a drafty 30 year old apartment free of these little poopers. I mean that literally, incidentally. Just look up roaches and you'll realize they're rightfully unwelcome. All this cleaning required a detergent purchase. Speaking of unwelcome squatters, I was also watching the Sooners play football while all this was going on.

I got a call from a Canadian friend who was in town. Not my normal Canadian friend but another one, she's more Nova Scotia way. Her and her brother wanted me to meet in SOHO for the art parade, but between Sooners, and dishes, and the need to shower and eat I didn't get there until 5 and the parade was over. But we ducked in to some bookstores in the area, I had to grab some water for $1.50, should've gone tap. We later dropped into a Mexican place, Pequnios? maybe. I had a chorizo quesadea and filled up on chips and salsa, still I spent $8. I left my friends at the movie theater and went back uptown to watch some flicks and maybe finish that wine. I was sort of rerouted via phone and ended up visiting another friend until the small hours of the night. Ah, youth.

Sunday morning I returned to the gym, and after a peanut butter snack I headed out to participate in my first ever Meetup.com event. For those of my readers form whom reading my blog is the hippest internet related thing they do, Meetup.com is a site where folks can search for activities and find other like-minded/activity-oriented people. So if you want to have a cigar smoking club, you can arrange one at this site. I was interested in Ultimate! Ultimate! is just a cheesy name for a Frisbee based game (aka Ultimate Frisbee,) it's like basketball and football combined only less organized. It's a great excuse to run your hiney off. The group met in Central Park on The Great Hill. It was a friendly affair and I had a really great touchdown grab. Nothing quite like ditching your defender with a quick sprint and the slapping a round piece of plastic between your hands. That was probably the highlight of the weekend. I didn't stay too long though, I felt like I was about to collapse from heat stroke or old age. My legs continue to hurt. Afterwards I walked around the park. Went home, more work on the cabinets, cleaning takes time. Then I dropped by the grocery store for some rations, and I also grabbed a couple of beers for an evening of tennis and more cleaning.

Monday it was back to work. And that's all fine and good. We keep getting new people at work, it's like we're the non-profit that could. I had to go to work after work, for this new job where I'm being trained. But I forgot my corporate literature and that blew. Because then I had to run home and by the time I got it, I had 15 minutes to get 30 blocks. So I had to grab a cab. I paid 8 dollars for a ride to a job where after taxes I probably made $16. After work I wrestled with the internet/cable company who unnecessarily cut off my internet access. Hence no blog. But it was finally resolved, though now I have way more channels than I could ever need, want, or watch.

Today I bought halal at lunch and a couple of beers after work. I think it all shakes out in the end. I may not be cutting my red down, but I'm not adding to it either.

Breakdown.

Starting Balance: -$122.25

In: $40

Saturday:
Detergent: $3
Water: $1.50
Mexican: $8

Sunday:
Groceries: $7
Beer: $2

Monday:
Taxi: $8

Tuesday:
Halal: $4
Beer: $2

Balance: -$117.75

August and Everything After

Damn. August. What a month. A month that lives up to its namesake, an emperor of a month, August. Many celebrate August because of the great Perseid meteor shower, or the fact that it is the birth ground of the greatest of Astrological signs, Leo, or because the clash of football gear cracks again on those distant, great, sprinkler-soaked swaths of manicured grass. Some love it because it heralds a return to college and the hazy daze of keg parties and text books, lascivious looks cast across library study room tables. The chlorine of the swimming pools takes on a pungent wanning shimmer, the lawn boy looks forward to the day he can stop hedging, the great locust cacophony swells and rattles, a crescendo before the end of summer. That dumb dog star howling his love for great Helios, who can barely reign in his earth diving steeds. God bless that smoldering bitch of an end of a season of a month. It's something else, no denying.

Sitting down to sketch out a quick review of the past months blogs I was surprised at all the activity. I had a friend from Italy come and visit. We drank scotch and watched the Hold Steady. I played Scrabble in my home and drank Sangria. There was a Lobster Burger at the Bryant Park Grill, gratis, care of the company. I aced a part time job interview, no doubts in my mind. A year ago I was a bumbling pickle, now I'm just a chilly cuke soaking in my smarmy brine. I met a young lady, we exchanged glances, had a few dances, and now there may be romance in the air as autumn sails in. I turned older, celebrated a birthday I was showered with good love from friends of many quarters both familiar and forgotten. I sipped Jalepeno Margaritas, scotch with a senorita, and beer with the fan base at the premier Leo McKegger. Whoo hoo. I made my own Skyline chili, performed admirably at a presentation, starting reading more poetry, and watched a few movies. The sky opened up and flooded the subway, I ate herring on a Sunday at Aquavit and chased it with beer. This is a lucky little life I've got over here. I learned that the White Horse Tavern sucks, Frodo wanders the streets of NYC (but is not lost) and credit card companies are Satan (care of Maxed Out, go watch this now). All in all it has been a pretty exceptional month. And even though we are more than a third of the way into September, this month is turning out OK too.

As far as the function of the blog. Well there's no denying that this month was a failure. I'm more than $150 behind and even that wouldn't put me on a free and clear track by 2008. Now, in the last 2 months I've been able to pay off $1200 of my bill. But I started at $4500 and if I was to be on track I should've knocked $1500 off. We'll see how well this new job helps out. If I can pull down about $400 more a month, I should still be on track to make it. I also need to come up with a way to get back in the green. I'm thinking Freegan. But we'll see if I've got the guts for that.

Updates coming. G'night, sweet August. G'nite Moon.

I Owe Somebody an Apology.

Hello, Blog. Listen Blog, we need to talk. See, I like you. I really do. And I'm not breaking up with you. I'm not. That isn't what this is about. At the end of my spiel you and I will still be friends. We'll continue to hold hands and be one. But Blog, baby Blog of mine, you make it hard. You do. See, I want to be a part of this. Many people do. I want to feel this love be this person and know this thing. I do. I do. But ten dollars a day? That's it? Ten dollars a day. Man Bloggy, Bloggy baby of mine, Bloggy boo, that's a lot to ask. That's a whole lot to ask.

See. I shut you out sure. And believe it or not Blog, peoples were disappointed. They were, they think we're a good couple. A few days, a week without you and me together, Blog, it hurt folks, folks I care about. They suffered in their own way. And it wasn't really an intended break. I didn't even mean it to last as long as it did. But you pushed me. See, I was talking to a friend of mine today. She said that sometimes the denial leads to going on binges. And that's what happened. That is exactly what happened. Well that and a friend came to town. And I told you blog, I said that I wouldn't be counting this weekend. There's no point on it. And listen. Listen, Blog, I've been with you for two months and I've been trying real hard to keep it together. So I went a little AWOL this weekend. I may have even gone backwards. I may have, como se dice, overextended myself.

See Adam was in town and you know how much I love that kid. So we went to bars, we went to ATMs, we went to restaurants. We didn't go to the tailors or the haberdashers or the dog tracks, but if you look around my kitchen you'll notice a new spice rack (crazy I know), you might see a few cans of beer, a few bottles of wine, you might trip over a new power strip or two. You might notice lots of things. But I swear baby, I've got it under control. Today, today I spent nothing. But otherwise, I put a lot of good money towards the bar tab that would better have been spent on the credit card. Sorta. I had fun this weekend. I relaxed. I did what you do as a host in New York City. You see the whole place all over again through the eyes of your guest and that is worth a good deal. But I feel like you and me have got some making up to do, Blog.

Listen. I started a new job. And that should help. That should help a bit. Unfortunately it is a corporate bullshit nightmare that reminds me of my first job at Taco Bueno. Blog, I'm working for you, in my way. I have to memorize a bunch of forms and look over mountains of non-disclosure, safety, harassment, and tutoring strategy forms, as if you can reduce teaching kids to a few pages. As if any one should have to go through all this crap just to make $6 an hour after taxes. I've worked in colleges, other tutoring centers, summer camps for children and I never had to go through the kind of rigmarole these jerks are putting me through. But I'm doing it for you Blog. And I swear, I won't be far away.

Let's hug it out, Blog.

Breakdown

Starting Balance: -$132.25

In: $10

Out: $0

Ending Balance: -$122.25